HOW THE REVISIONISTS CONTROL ECUSA

"It is sometimes said that conduct is supremely important, and worship helps it. The truth is that worship is supremely important, and conduct tests it." Archbishop William Temple

Dear Brothers and Sisters,

If there is one lesson the revisionists have learned and learned well it is that if they win the bishoprics they not only control the direction of the church, they have the majority vote in the House of Bishops and who will eventually succeed Frank Griswold. They also know that a revisionist bishop can control who comes into the diocese, beat up on faithful Evangelicals and Anglo-Catholics who disagree with them on the 'faith once delivered', control the money flow to 815 to keep the national church's agenda alive, intimidate faithful rectors and much more. They also know that the bishop is capable of ripping up parishes if need be, deposing the rector and turn a once thriving parish into a mission. Just ask the folk in Versailles, Kentucky.

The revisionists will do whatever it takes to win. They will employ every sleazy tactic in the book to get their man or woman elected. Consider what they did in the Diocese of North Dakota, Rio Grande, Colorado and more.

The worst case is currently going in the diocese of the Rio Grande, where the godly Terence Kelshaw retires in 2005 and a single revisionist priest got hold of the entire diocesan mailing list and used it to promote his revisionist cause.

So the lesson is this. First of all control the process. Make sure that the Search Committee chosen to investigate the candidates has several homosexual or pansexual believers on it. Then make sure that every candidate answers a question or two about the limits (or non-limits) of inclusivity, diversity and the usual buzzwords about sexual orientation, support of 815, abiding by the canons and constitutions etc. and then weed out any orthodox contenders. Then make sure that whoever is elected, and it really doesn't matter at this point if he or she believes in the creeds or 39 Articles, prays regularly, reads the Bible regularly, if at all, but will they make the appropriate noises about God's promiscuous love for all peoples between whatever sheets are available at the moment, preferably Versace, as he had pretty good idea about the non-limits of homoerotic behavior.

The most important thing is learning how to dress up, put on a good show when you go visiting a local parish, mouth platitudes, pat a few heads, baptize and confirm a few adults (while still remaining dressed up), sit in a fancy chair and look good. Whatever you do don't say too much if the congregation just happens to know what the Bible teaches, but breathe the air of inclusivity and God's promiscuous love for all peoples, and tell the rector (privately) that if he doesn't cough up more money to keep the diocese afloat he will remove him. Do it all with a smile, and then leave in your limousine.

[Content continues with full editorial commentary by David W. Virtue about church politics and conflicts]