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Why Are Some People Gay?

Why Are Some People Gay?

By Mike McManus
July 15, 2009

This week The Episcopal Church voted to allow all baptized persons access to "any ordained ministry" such as being a priest or bishop. The National Educational Association, a teacher's union, also voted to endorse "same-sex marriage."

I just read Michael Reagan's book, "Twice Adopted," which reports the terrifying evidence of why many become homosexual. The adopted son of Ronald Reagan and Academy Award winner Jane Wyman - lived through their divorce and found himself in a boarding school at age five, crying himself to sleep.

Michael wondered why some kids in his school went home every night, while he did not. "What's wrong with me?" he wondered. "Why don't my parents like me."

His mother was making two or three movies a year, like his dad, who was also President of the Screen Actors Guild. They had little time for him, though each saw him every other weekend.

Michael was so unhappy his mother brought him home at age 7, enrolled him in a day school, and in an after-school day camp program, which he thought "was great. I'd go to school, finish the afternoon at camp, then come home for dinner with Mom, living my life like a normal kid."

"I couldn't have been more wrong. The worst thing that could possibly happen to a child was about to happen to me." Don Havlik, his camp director, paid excessive attention to the boy.

One day he asked, "Mike, you want to do something to make me feel good?" He unzipped his pants...It was horrifying. Reagan recalled, "That first sex act solidifies the molester's ownership of you. Don wanted to touch me, or me to touch him every time we went someplace."

"Molesters make you feel good about yourself for a while, but once the molestation takes place, they own your soul. You don't know how to get away from it. You never think the molester did something wrong. You think you did something wrong."

Don took a picture of him nude, and showed it to him, asking: "Wouldn't your mom like to have a copy of that picture?" Until that moment, Michael thought that Don was his friend, even like a father. But when he saw that picture and heard his implied threat of showing it to his mother, he "felt violated. I felt raped...My self-esteem, which had been low before, hit rock bottom."

"I blamed God and hated him for the fix I was in. I was sure he had sent Don Havlik into my life to molest me and shame me as a punishment for being born illegitimate...I was angry with my birth mother for letting me be born illegitimate, for causing me all this pain, and for sending me away. I also blamed Mom for sending me to that day camp."

It was such a shameful experience, he could not tell anyone about it for 35 years.

What was most horrifying about his secret is that he was afraid he would be labeled. Though he had never heard the word "homosexual," at age 7, he knew he had been touched by a man, which did not sound normal. Fortunately, Reagan did become heterosexual and married happily.

Many studies estimate that 40 percent to two-thirds of homosexuals - are victims of child molesters, according to Dr. Arthur Goldberg, President of PATH (Positive Alternatives to Homosexuality.) He adds that even higher percentages of lesbians were victims of child molestation.

I have never seen these stunning figures in the secular press before.

Fortunately, from one-third to two-thirds of gays can break free of that lifestyle, reports Dr. Joseph Nicolosi, President of the National Association of Research and Therapy of Homosexuality.

Reagan's book asserts that most molesters appear to be charming and are typically people you and your child know and trust. Therefore, he warns parents to take key steps:

1. Tell children that if anyone touches them inappropriately to tell you.

2. Never keep secrets from mommy and daddy. If someone wants them to keep a secret, that person may be doing a bad thing. Molesters almost always swear the child to secrecy.

3. Watch out for any adults or teenagers who pay an unusual amount of attention to your child.

4. Play "What if" games with kids. "What if a grownup you know tickled you a lot and you don't like it. What would you do? What if a grownup offers you money if you take your clothes off?"

5. Look for evidence that your child may have been abused, such as having sexual knowledge beyond their age, or money you did not give them. If the child is withdrawn, destructive, angry, guilty or ashamed, or is obsessed with protecting siblings, ask questions.

This issue goes far beyond same-sex marriage. Every step which normalizes homosexuality will attract more people into this perverted lifestyle, endangering children.

----Michael J. McManus is a syndicated columnist writing on "Ethics & Religion". He is President & Co-Chair of Marriage Savers. He lives with his wife in Potomac, MD

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